Saturday, November 19, 2011

A letter to my daughter

Dear Avery,

       We got to see you swimming again today. You looked beautiful as always. The doctors laugh because they can never get good pictures of you when you won't stay still. I don't mind though because I love to feel you in my tummy. I know you are just moving to ease my fears and I love you for that. You had the hiccups today. It was the cutest thing I have ever seen. I can't wait until the day that I can feel those too. I just love to know you are there.

       We got some scary news today; news that you might not be able to live on earth. We pray and pray that this is not true, but we thank God for each day that we are spending with you now. Your daddy and I love you very very much. You have wonderful grandparents and aunts and uncles that would do anything for you too. You were put in one pretty strong family-I think that is why God chose to give you to us.

      I never realized how much your Mimi and Papa loved me until now. I always knew I was loved, but I could never fathom the depth. That is how much I love you.

     I hope that you and I can sit down when you are older and read these letters together. Then we can look back and smile on the fact that you were the one who beat the odds. Until then, we are going to be thankful for each day we have with you. Could you do me a favor? Try to kick a little harder soon so your daddy can feel you too. He loves you more than you know and I feel a little selfish that he can't experience you the same way that I can. We decided that we are going to get as many ultrasounds as possible so that we can see you and watch you grow.

      I love being pregnant with you. Every day that my belly grows is another day that I have with you. I love to look at my big belly in the mirror and your daddy loves to rub it....it reminds us how real you are. Your dog, Tucker, is always trying to snuggle with you. He loves to lay his head on my tummy so that he can be close to you. We all just want to be close to you.

      Mommy and Daddy have some wonderful friends who love you almost as much as your family does. They are all praying hard that God will get you healthy enough to make it here okay. Some of them even sent you flowers today to show they cared. They were beautiful.

      I have a hard time sleeping at night because I think about you so much. Tonight I slept for about two hours and then got up to write this to you. I am going to try to go back to sleep in a little bit, but I wanted to let you know all that I am feeling first.

      Please keep growing sweet girl. You are going to have some rough times as you develop, but we need you to hold on to life and continue to grow. We will do anything to help you that we possibly can. Right now, prayers are all we have.

      We love you more than anything in the world and always will. I want to be strong like you, but it is tough. Take care of yourself and keep letting us know that you are safe.

                                                                             All my love,

                                                                                          Mom

1 comment:

  1. My baby girl Carey,

    I am so proud of you. I wish I could take away all the pain and hurt you are having to go through. Like a poem you wrote to me one Mother’s Day titled “What Is a Mom”, you said “A mom would take a bullet for her child”. Those words are so, so true. If I could take away the pain I would. I love you so much and I love our baby girl, Avery. I think about you two non-stop. I know you love our baby girl Avery so much already. We know God has a plan for us and we will take it one day at a time. Remember that we will all go through this together. You are never alone. We thank God for Jeff. You two are both very special people. You will both be wonderful parent’s one day.

    Love, Mom

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