Dear Avery,
Yesterday your dad and I celebrated two years of wedded bliss. I love him even more today than I did the day that we said "I do." He is my rock and I couldn't imagine spending this crazy life with anyone other than him. You are a lucky girl to call him your dad and I am a lucky lady to call him my husband!
I love you Princess,
Mom
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Mother's Day
Dear Avery,
It is my first Mother's Day today. I should be snuggling you and looking forward to learning your future, but instead I sit and mourn your past. I mourn the future that I will never know and I miss you so much. This rainy weather seems so appropriate for the way that I feel right now.
We went to Buckhead's for lunch today and they handed each mother a flower when they walked in the door. They didn't hand me one and it really hurt. It was just a stupid carnation but I wanted it. I wanted them to tell me happy Mother's Day and acknowledge that I was a mother too, but they never did. I wanted for your dad to stand up and tell them that they made a huge mistake and forgot to give one to me, but he can't read my mind and he never did. I just wanted for them, all of them, to know that you lived. I just wanted the chance to talk about you and it never came. I miss you so much Avery and I wish with every ounce of my being that you were here in my arms.
I love you baby,
Mom
It is my first Mother's Day today. I should be snuggling you and looking forward to learning your future, but instead I sit and mourn your past. I mourn the future that I will never know and I miss you so much. This rainy weather seems so appropriate for the way that I feel right now.
We went to Buckhead's for lunch today and they handed each mother a flower when they walked in the door. They didn't hand me one and it really hurt. It was just a stupid carnation but I wanted it. I wanted them to tell me happy Mother's Day and acknowledge that I was a mother too, but they never did. I wanted for your dad to stand up and tell them that they made a huge mistake and forgot to give one to me, but he can't read my mind and he never did. I just wanted for them, all of them, to know that you lived. I just wanted the chance to talk about you and it never came. I miss you so much Avery and I wish with every ounce of my being that you were here in my arms.
I love you baby,
Mom
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Alis Volat Propiis
Dear Avery,
I always thought that my middle name was a mistake--that your Mimi wrote it wrong on my birth certificate and that is why no one can pronounce it. Now, I realize that the lack of an "e" was no mistake at all. It was destiny. You are Alis because I am Alis. I wanted to give you a piece of my name because you are a piece of me. And it is only now that I realize how appropriate that name is for a beautiful angel.
Alis Volat Propiis. I ran across this quote today and it piqued my curiousity. Of course I had to look it up and figure out what our middle name actually means. Alis volat propiis is a latin phrase that means "She flies with her own wings." Alis means winged-just like you are sweet angel!
I texted Mimi earlier to tell her that Alis volat propiis means she flies with her own wings. Mimi texted me back that, "She is only flying if Aunt Pallie will put her down," and that brought a huge smile to my face. I love the thought of you snuggling with Aunt Pallie in heaven. She was a huge part of my childhood and now she is a huge part of yours too! She was never able to have children until now; now she has you. If I can't have you with me, she is my first choice for the job until I can get to you. Please give her a huge hug from me!
I love you and miss you,
Mom
I always thought that my middle name was a mistake--that your Mimi wrote it wrong on my birth certificate and that is why no one can pronounce it. Now, I realize that the lack of an "e" was no mistake at all. It was destiny. You are Alis because I am Alis. I wanted to give you a piece of my name because you are a piece of me. And it is only now that I realize how appropriate that name is for a beautiful angel.
Alis Volat Propiis. I ran across this quote today and it piqued my curiousity. Of course I had to look it up and figure out what our middle name actually means. Alis volat propiis is a latin phrase that means "She flies with her own wings." Alis means winged-just like you are sweet angel!
I texted Mimi earlier to tell her that Alis volat propiis means she flies with her own wings. Mimi texted me back that, "She is only flying if Aunt Pallie will put her down," and that brought a huge smile to my face. I love the thought of you snuggling with Aunt Pallie in heaven. She was a huge part of my childhood and now she is a huge part of yours too! She was never able to have children until now; now she has you. If I can't have you with me, she is my first choice for the job until I can get to you. Please give her a huge hug from me!
I love you and miss you,
Mom
Thursday, May 3, 2012
Dear Avery,
I miss you so much sweet angel. Sometimes I truly can't believe that this is my life; that you are really gone. I desparately want you back here with us. I want a chance to hold you again, to raise you, to get to know you better. Sometimes I feel like if I just concentrate on it hard enough that you might come back. I know that is crazy talk, impossible actually, but I keep on wishing and praying that my baby was in my arms. That is where babies are supposed to be--in their mother's arms. You shouldn't be in the ground sweet girl. It isn't right. Parents aren't supposed to bury their children. It isn't natural! This just isn't fair...babies aren't supposed to die.
I want you back Princess,
Mom
I miss you so much sweet angel. Sometimes I truly can't believe that this is my life; that you are really gone. I desparately want you back here with us. I want a chance to hold you again, to raise you, to get to know you better. Sometimes I feel like if I just concentrate on it hard enough that you might come back. I know that is crazy talk, impossible actually, but I keep on wishing and praying that my baby was in my arms. That is where babies are supposed to be--in their mother's arms. You shouldn't be in the ground sweet girl. It isn't right. Parents aren't supposed to bury their children. It isn't natural! This just isn't fair...babies aren't supposed to die.
I want you back Princess,
Mom
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