Thursday, August 16, 2012

Dear Avery,
     I really miss you sweet girl.  I always miss you, but it hurts a little bit more today.  I just can't wrap my head around the fact that it has already been 6 months.  Somehow we have survived it, and I would even dare to say that we are happy the majority of the time, but it will never feel natural to live in this world without you in it. 

      So much has happened these past 6 months.  Weddings,births,trips,pregnancies--things are constantly changing.  Amidst all of the changes, the only constant in my life is the knowledge that you will never be coming back.  That is the hardest truth that any mother will ever have to come to terms with. 

     I am excited for the new baby, but that excitement is exclusive of the fact that I am still mourning your death.  No other child will ever take your place and our family will always feel incomplete without you. 

    We got to see your little sibling again last week and they are looking as healthy as can be.  I have a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that this child may actually make it home.  You looked healthy at this point in pregnancy too.

     One thing that brought me a little bit of peace, is that the doctor moved the new baby's due date up.  He moved it to March 3, 2013 or 3-3-13.  Those numbers brought me so much comfort and I know that you are protecting us.

                                                          I love you so much angel,

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